Unrequited Love
It is difficult to understand why Mary Ann Clark endured so much suffering for a man who mentally, emotionally, and perhaps physically, abused her. Her mother said she loved George Walker devotedly and always hoped he would become the man she deserved. But he did not reciprocate, and she ultimately failed to reclaim her husband. Unrequited love is one of the most helpless and painful feelings someone must endure because an individual cannot control another's feelings. And so, one is caught between experiencing the euphoria of love and the agony of loss simultaneously. It is maddening. Clark's mother constantly talked about a gloom that settled over her and that she could plainly see the symptoms of insanity beginning to take hold. While it is difficult to diagnose Clark as actually languishing from insanity, she was most assuredly suffering from depression. After all, the hope she had for a peaceful life with a husband and children she dearly loved had been ripped from her, leaving a pit of despair and nothingness.
Like Clark, Emma Edmonds was also hurled into an emotional crisis when she gave her heart to Jerome Robbins. Edmonds met Robbins in the army when they were both serving in a hospital: Emma as a nurse and Robbins as a hospital steward. They had much in common and enjoyed spending time together — as friends, of course. At this time, Emma was disguised as a man so that she could get into the army as a soldier. And it put her in a very delicate situation because she fell in love with her friend who thought she was a fellow man. One can only imagine the agony she must have endured during that time determining her path. If she told him, shy may lose him to the shock of the truth she harbored. But how could she not share the love she had for him, especially after fear set in that she may lose him to a new love interest for Jerome back home in Michigan.
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| Jerome Robbins |
She was caged. And in an effort to free herself, she hit Jerome with a double whammy when revealing that his friend "Frank" was actually a woman and that she was offering her heart. He broke it when promptly returning it. Robbins recorded in his diary,
"God knows my heart that towards her I entertain the kindest feelings, but it really seems that a great change has taken place in her disposition..."
How could one not change when baring one's soul to another results in deep wounds to the psyche? Éowyn came to realize this after she met Aragorn who was visiting Meduseld. Also known as the Golden Hall, it was located in Edoras, the capital of Rohan. And Aragorn was there with Gandalf, Legolas, and Gimli to help defend the Rohirrim against an attack by the dark forces. It was during this time when Éowyn met him, "tall heir of kings, wise with many winters, greycloaked, hiding a power that she yet felt" (Two Towers, Book 3, Chapter 6).
And she fell in love with Aragorn — at least so she thought. Aragorn could discern the truth, though she could not. He observed,
"In me she loves only a shadow and a thought: a hope of glory and great deeds, and lands far from the fields of Rohan" (Return of the King, Book 5, Chapter 8)
Besides, Aragorn's heart belonged to another, Arwen, though Éowyn was not aware of it. Interstingly, Aragorn returned Éowyn's love and married her in an early version of the manuscript. However, Tolkien changed it because Aragorn was "too old and lordly and grim" for Éowyn (Christopher Tolkien, Treason of Isengard, 448). Éowyn was in her twenties and Aragorn his eighties at the time of the War of the Ring. So the professor provided Aragorn with another lover, Arwen. Be aware that the romance between them is largely relegated to the appendices in the book. Bringing the couple's love to prominence in the films was one of the liberties Jackson took.
But it is true that Éowyn was drawn to Aragorn because she believed he offered her the life for which she longed. As previously discussed, Éowyn's familial situation resulted in her growing up among boys. She learned how to defend herself and ride horses per her people's tradition. Most women soldiers of the Civil War had similar backgrounds growing up on farms where they also learned how to ride and shoot. For example, Emma Edmonds could ride horses better than most boys by the time she was ten. She was also skillful at hunting and fishing. As she grew, Emma developed a reckless streak, and her indifference towards her own well-being so disturbed her mother that she confided in a priest that she feared her daughter would meet an untimely end.
As for Éowyn and her Rohirrim, they loved "war and valour as things good in themselves, both a sport and an end." Warriors were esteemed "above men of other crafts" (Two Towers, Window in the West). Therefore, she learned that men inextricably linked honor and self-worth with performing heroic deeds on a battlefield. And she believed that to be her destiny as well. She was a shieldmaiden, trained to wield a blade, undaunted by pain or death. When Aragorn asked what she feared, she replied:
"A cage to stay behind bars, until use and old age accept them, and all chance of doing great deeds is gone beyond recall or desire" (Return of the King, Book 5, Chapter 2).
And so when the men rode off to war, Éowyn desperately wanted to go with them. Yet, she was duty bound to remain behind. Upon the eve of the Rohirrim's departure for Helm's Deep to fight in the Battle of the Hornburg, Háma, a Rider of Rohan, suggested that Théoden leave his niece in charge, "She is fearless and high-hearted. All love her. Let her be as lord" (Two Towers, Book 3, Chapter 6). And so, the king left her in charge of the kingdom. This was no small assignment. Nor was it a feminine one. But it was not enough for her ambition. She later lamented to Aragorn, who had reminded her of her charge, "Too often have I heard of duty...May I not now spend my life as I will?.....Shall I always be left behind when the Riders depart, to mind the house while they win renown...?" How did she want to spend her life? "I'm weary of skulking in the hills, and wish to face peril in battle" (Return of the King, Book 5, Chapter 2). And so she begged Aragorn to allow her to accompany him to war. She even appeared in chainmail and bore a sword. Yet, he refused her, citing lack of permission from her uncle and brother.
So there she stood, "still as a figure carven in stone, her hands clinched at her sides," as she watched the men ride off to war while despairing in her rejection and languishing in her cage.
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